[Music] why should you use the word what instead of why why makes our defenses go up so if someone asks why did that happen why did you do that immediately the person on the receiving end is like you know feels finger-pointing and you know their guard goes up so rather than asking why what happened that this occurred what caused you to do that it takes the blame out of it and still gets the question out there where you can learn and grow from the what actually happened and give feedback why is this important well it's important because as leaders we coach and train people we develop people that work with and for us and when we do that and we're trying to teach them if we use the word why a lot of times they're not learning but if we ask questions in a what format or a how format they can hear what we're saying and they're receptive to the feedback and can actually grow and learn from it so if you want your feedback to be better received and your questions for learning and growth go in with curiosity with what questions and how questions and leave the y at the door [Music]